I’m really sorry mater Wolf, it wasn’t me I swear!
It was my grandma, seeing you in her underwear!
Next time in the woods don’t follow little reds
How about blues or pinks instead
My mamma said see granny it will do you good
Take this food platter and and take it through the woods
Take the good path for happy little girls
Don’t take the bad path that has bad luck wells
I only did what she told me to do
I couldn’t do the wrong thing if I wanted too
So I hopped on my bike and started riding
Whizzing past, my red cape gliding
You must have heard me coming by
Because on the path you swapped the sign!
The good path was pointing to bad
And the other way around, what a nasty young lad!
The bad path I went I followed I did
But it was when you sniffed me, ooh ‘The Kid’
When I encountered you I let out a sigh
I went on the bad path why, oh why!
You gave me a smile with those big chunky jaws
And said is that food yours?
I nodded in reply, I can’t speak to strangers
My mamma said it is their smarts and dangers
You asked me where are you off to
I thought really hard so I pointed the truth
I pointed to the distant cottage where my grandma stays
The next thing I knew you were off and away
I didn’t know where you went so I followed the trail
I didn’t hear in the distant a petite grandma wail
I eventually got to the cottage and knocked on the door
I didn’t hear an answer, I did hear a roar
I let myself in and looked around
Everything was perfect safe and sound
When I got granny’s room I saw you
Under the covers wearing shoes
I asked, my what big eyes you have!
And you said all the better to see you with
I asked, my what what big ears you have!
And you said all the better to hear you with
I asked again, my what big teeth you have!
All the better to eat you with!
What, wait, uh oh, run is what I thought
Before I was almost caught
But then out of nowhere granny jumped out
I saw her a second ago did I see her?
‘Granny’ I said well I sorta had to shout
Where have you been?
Apparently she’d been knocked out
By you I supposed I had to be
It couldn’t be anyone else including me
YOU were about to pounce on my beloved ma
When a wood cutter came in not very far
He took out his axe and cut you in half
He could only do one thing and that was to laugh!
I really felt sorry for you I did I swear!
But for a wolf there’d not much to care
I ate you for dinner with extra salt
So as you can see it was not my fault
Little Red Riding hood
To Mr Wolf who’s grave is in the woods